At 21 I drove through amazing neighborhood after amazing neighborhood. I couldn’t believe one city contained so many flavors. It’s changed; what city or town or neighborhood in the world hasn’t? It’s an easy target because it is so beautiful. I’ve never understood someone trying to convince me that sf sucks. And that another city is better. I honestly could care less why you think this city sucks, because it has nothing to do with the city, and everything to do with the person cutting it down. Different strokes for different folks. I love SF. I love NYC, I love Pittsburgh. I love Miami. I love Puerto Vallarta. I love Paris. And there are things I don’t like about each one of them. I’d rather talk about the good stuff. ❤️
100% !! Every city has its bad stuff. But every city has good things too. I respect the people who see that so much more than the unimaginative haters.
I lived there 1991-2018, after visiting through the 80s. In the 90s there was nowhere like it even on the west coast where every city from San Diego to Vancouver seemed to thriving through a recession and a renaissance. I lived right behind Josie’s Cabaret & Juice Joint (16th & Noe), afternoons I could hear the music. Would watch the fog billow over Twin Peaks while the sky was a cloudless bright blue above. Tech destroyed that variegated culture — you’ve heard the tale 1000 times — but San Francisco will survive. And new people will make it new again. A truly beautiful city.
Covid killed Zeitgeist. Used to be my absolute favorite (besides El Rio anyhow). Amazed at how serious they took all that bs. Turns out their anarchy posing was really totalitarianism. Sad, but oh well. Yeah, Lucky 13 closed a couple years ago. That was a real winner, too.
El Rio. Your Dive!....lol. Was quite a ways out Mission tho, if I remember?
Is it still there? Is 500 Club? (I realize these places became hipster breeding grounds, but they did come from an authentic place at one time. My Dad, Uncles went to the 500 Club way back when).
El Rio is not that far when it’s on your doorstep. 500 club was still kicking last I checked. Moved 5 years ago. Lots of turnover but I suppose it’s always been that way. I remember some dipshit thought it would be a good idea to get rid of imperial pints at the Phoenix for regular pints. That went over like a lead balloon. They went back but it was too late. They closed shortly thereafter.
Love this post and how it explores what it means to love a place with its perfections, imperfections, and everything in between. I also like how it touches on that when you stay at a place long enough it becomes two places in a way—one of which is the physical place itself while the other is a place in your mind full of all the memories you’ve experienced there. I’ve lived in the same place for 6 years, and even with so many changes, I still love it all the same.
As Mexican woman (but a mix of México/Andalucía/Honduras), I can say that loving many places at the same time comes as my expertise.
I’ve been to San Francisco once, and it’s still one of my favorite places, maybe it’s because it holds such special memories, maybe it’s because I’ve deeply loved a man who lives there.
But wandering through San Francisco, even by my own, buying some sale shorts at Haight Asbury that I can’t stop wearing, being deeply moved by an abstract grief piece at the MOMA, shouting at a Warrior’s game that feels deeply personal, having breakfast at an almost flooded café in Sausalito, but mostly holding hands, kissing and running with North Beach & Chinatown as witnesses…I was moved and I belonged.
Your piece moved me. Thank you for the defending your city, I can’t understand how not to love it.
I moved from Oakland to LA four years ago and lately I feel SF calling my name. For some of the reasons you mentioned (memories at dive bars) but also family and fog and parks, a slower, less appearance oriented way of living. There’s definitely something special there. Thank you for confirming 💛
Always remember the day, summer of 68, I was 10 years old, and my Dad was driving down Haight in our old station wagon from Iowa. I couldn’t believe how many young people there were, just hanging out and I mean literally they were hanging out from fire escapes and apartment windows. I spied a girl not much older than me smiling at me and I knew I had to come back to this enchanted place.
After college, I did come back and I met my now wife at work at a law firm in the Embarcadero. We were married at City Hall three months later. 2 of my children were born in the City. We left in 93 because we couldn’t afford to raise a family there. I miss the fog horns with their early morning wail from our apartment at 24th and Fulton. So many good memories of the City by the Bay.
I love this piece because it captures the heart of someone who has the city in their heart and soul. I'm a 2nd generation San Franciscan and grew up on stories of San Francisco in the 40's 50's and 60's, with black and white photos of Market St and cocktail parties in living rooms from Webster Street to 39th and Balboa . I experienced the tail end of an era where we called it a small town in a city. Which was what made it so special. There was real community - like generations of family living blocks away from each other.
I think every city goes through this cycle, and no doubt SF rode the wave for a long time and now it's at the bottom of desirable places to live.
Everything changes, it'll be back on top again.
I've made the joke that it's like the bad boyfriend you keep going back to. You swear you won't do it again...but you keep getting pulled back in.
Thanks for sharing this. I love listening to people who have embraced the heart of it like you have.
It was wandering through the Haight on a Friday night, sharing the better weed, going to Wolfgang’s to roar and scream at every song the Talking Heads played. It was the Farmer’s Market at the Ferry Building and those omelette served with garlic spuds, insanely good coffee as the dogs barked ‘good morning’. It was going to see the Allman Brothers just a couple of months before we lost Duane; it was that black cat who played the sax better than Clarence ever did and those two dudes that screamed ‘East Coast’ who played the zither near Ghirardelli. It was that hole-in-the-wall joint off Columbus that served the pasta to die for and that great Neapolitan pizza, and Green Apple Books which always had some worth reading for just a couple of bucks. And of course it was the Dead; going into a concert straight as a die and coming out hours later mumbling ‘far out, man …where the hell did we park ?’ “San Francisco, open your Golden Gate , don’t let a stranger wait outside your door…..”
What a lovely piece! I moved to SF 3 years ago from SoCal (could I be more out of place?). I lived in The City for 2 years and it was challengingly awesome! I only live a few miles away now and I look forward to visiting my favorite spots. When I read haters’ comments about The City, I know they’re parroting others’ who’ve never been here. Too bad for them…
Oh wow, where do I start? This pulled on my heart strings, all the way from Geary and Fillmore out to Sutro Baths. I am also a lover of SF. Grandpa was born there in 1900. I lived in the City (grew up in Oakland) through my 20s and 30s, probably going to some of the same bars as you. I was as in love with the City as anyone. And I have such mixed feelings about how I left. Thanks so much for writing this.
Beautiful Teetee! I have found myself so drawn to this place since coming out there/here for work. The Ubers take forever (but now Waymo 😍) and I am often cold (i.e. willfully pack for whatever the weather is on the east coast), but there is a definite magic to it and I “get it”. I often say to people now, had I discovered it sooner, I would have wanted to try Karl in my 20s.
By the way my honeymoon was in San Francisco for two weeks back in 2001 - I was a BABY - had my first Indian food there and saw my first anime film and made so many cool memories and met the best people… Saw so many strange things too but found it all really fascinating- the city was so fascinating to me - beautiful decay - the juxtapositions- the contrasts, I was dazzled. When I went back in 2011 to meet all of you at Chronicle for my book tour, it had changed in 10 years but I still loved it. I’ll never forget bringing 65 checks to Wells Fargo in 2001 and begging the bank to cash them because it was the only money we had for our honeymoon. We landed with $200 in our wallet and 3k in wedding checks. They assured us it would take 7-10 days before they cleared. I cried. We had $10 left and 8 days ahead of us. Stupid kids I know. BUT. The guy at the bank worked some kind of magic because the next day he called my hotel and told me to come over - all the checks had cleared. I cried some more. He did that for us. I honestly could never talk shit about San Francisco after that.
i love love love this. i’ve lived in SF for nearly a decade and refuse to leave. i heard someone on a podcast recently say she thought mill valley had ‘more going on’ while she then proceeded to call SF weird for 15 minutes. i saw red and her podcast is now dead to me. she clearly didn’t know how to experience all that SF offers, and that’s fine bc she prob doesn’t deserve it anyway.
thank you for loving on a city that i am so tired of hearing nothing but negative things about. i too have started to believe that someone hating SF is more of a reflection of them as a person than us as a city.
People in NY write about leaving NY; people in SF write about not leaving SF; people in LA write about themselves.
So elegant - I love that.
At 21 I drove through amazing neighborhood after amazing neighborhood. I couldn’t believe one city contained so many flavors. It’s changed; what city or town or neighborhood in the world hasn’t? It’s an easy target because it is so beautiful. I’ve never understood someone trying to convince me that sf sucks. And that another city is better. I honestly could care less why you think this city sucks, because it has nothing to do with the city, and everything to do with the person cutting it down. Different strokes for different folks. I love SF. I love NYC, I love Pittsburgh. I love Miami. I love Puerto Vallarta. I love Paris. And there are things I don’t like about each one of them. I’d rather talk about the good stuff. ❤️
100% !! Every city has its bad stuff. But every city has good things too. I respect the people who see that so much more than the unimaginative haters.
I lived there 1991-2018, after visiting through the 80s. In the 90s there was nowhere like it even on the west coast where every city from San Diego to Vancouver seemed to thriving through a recession and a renaissance. I lived right behind Josie’s Cabaret & Juice Joint (16th & Noe), afternoons I could hear the music. Would watch the fog billow over Twin Peaks while the sky was a cloudless bright blue above. Tech destroyed that variegated culture — you’ve heard the tale 1000 times — but San Francisco will survive. And new people will make it new again. A truly beautiful city.
I love reading these SF memories so much. Thanks for sharing yours. And I agree the city will survive all of it.
Sparkys Diner, Zeitgeist, Du Nord, Tops Diner, Lucky 13, Josies, Safeway(lol)....pretty fuckin hip neighborhood in the 80s/90s.
(prob mostly all gone by now....)
Covid killed Zeitgeist. Used to be my absolute favorite (besides El Rio anyhow). Amazed at how serious they took all that bs. Turns out their anarchy posing was really totalitarianism. Sad, but oh well. Yeah, Lucky 13 closed a couple years ago. That was a real winner, too.
El Rio. Your Dive!....lol. Was quite a ways out Mission tho, if I remember?
Is it still there? Is 500 Club? (I realize these places became hipster breeding grounds, but they did come from an authentic place at one time. My Dad, Uncles went to the 500 Club way back when).
Re: Zeitgeist...not surprising really.
El Rio is not that far when it’s on your doorstep. 500 club was still kicking last I checked. Moved 5 years ago. Lots of turnover but I suppose it’s always been that way. I remember some dipshit thought it would be a good idea to get rid of imperial pints at the Phoenix for regular pints. That went over like a lead balloon. They went back but it was too late. They closed shortly thereafter.
Brought a tear to me eye 🥹
💗
Love this post and how it explores what it means to love a place with its perfections, imperfections, and everything in between. I also like how it touches on that when you stay at a place long enough it becomes two places in a way—one of which is the physical place itself while the other is a place in your mind full of all the memories you’ve experienced there. I’ve lived in the same place for 6 years, and even with so many changes, I still love it all the same.
Yes exactly. 💗
As Mexican woman (but a mix of México/Andalucía/Honduras), I can say that loving many places at the same time comes as my expertise.
I’ve been to San Francisco once, and it’s still one of my favorite places, maybe it’s because it holds such special memories, maybe it’s because I’ve deeply loved a man who lives there.
But wandering through San Francisco, even by my own, buying some sale shorts at Haight Asbury that I can’t stop wearing, being deeply moved by an abstract grief piece at the MOMA, shouting at a Warrior’s game that feels deeply personal, having breakfast at an almost flooded café in Sausalito, but mostly holding hands, kissing and running with North Beach & Chinatown as witnesses…I was moved and I belonged.
Your piece moved me. Thank you for the defending your city, I can’t understand how not to love it.
I moved from Oakland to LA four years ago and lately I feel SF calling my name. For some of the reasons you mentioned (memories at dive bars) but also family and fog and parks, a slower, less appearance oriented way of living. There’s definitely something special there. Thank you for confirming 💛
Thanks for reading. East bay is so good too!
Always remember the day, summer of 68, I was 10 years old, and my Dad was driving down Haight in our old station wagon from Iowa. I couldn’t believe how many young people there were, just hanging out and I mean literally they were hanging out from fire escapes and apartment windows. I spied a girl not much older than me smiling at me and I knew I had to come back to this enchanted place.
After college, I did come back and I met my now wife at work at a law firm in the Embarcadero. We were married at City Hall three months later. 2 of my children were born in the City. We left in 93 because we couldn’t afford to raise a family there. I miss the fog horns with their early morning wail from our apartment at 24th and Fulton. So many good memories of the City by the Bay.
Christina,
I love this piece because it captures the heart of someone who has the city in their heart and soul. I'm a 2nd generation San Franciscan and grew up on stories of San Francisco in the 40's 50's and 60's, with black and white photos of Market St and cocktail parties in living rooms from Webster Street to 39th and Balboa . I experienced the tail end of an era where we called it a small town in a city. Which was what made it so special. There was real community - like generations of family living blocks away from each other.
I think every city goes through this cycle, and no doubt SF rode the wave for a long time and now it's at the bottom of desirable places to live.
Everything changes, it'll be back on top again.
I've made the joke that it's like the bad boyfriend you keep going back to. You swear you won't do it again...but you keep getting pulled back in.
Thanks for sharing this. I love listening to people who have embraced the heart of it like you have.
Thanks for this comment and perspective Jen. I love this.
It was wandering through the Haight on a Friday night, sharing the better weed, going to Wolfgang’s to roar and scream at every song the Talking Heads played. It was the Farmer’s Market at the Ferry Building and those omelette served with garlic spuds, insanely good coffee as the dogs barked ‘good morning’. It was going to see the Allman Brothers just a couple of months before we lost Duane; it was that black cat who played the sax better than Clarence ever did and those two dudes that screamed ‘East Coast’ who played the zither near Ghirardelli. It was that hole-in-the-wall joint off Columbus that served the pasta to die for and that great Neapolitan pizza, and Green Apple Books which always had some worth reading for just a couple of bucks. And of course it was the Dead; going into a concert straight as a die and coming out hours later mumbling ‘far out, man …where the hell did we park ?’ “San Francisco, open your Golden Gate , don’t let a stranger wait outside your door…..”
Yes yes yes. I love all of this.
What a lovely piece! I moved to SF 3 years ago from SoCal (could I be more out of place?). I lived in The City for 2 years and it was challengingly awesome! I only live a few miles away now and I look forward to visiting my favorite spots. When I read haters’ comments about The City, I know they’re parroting others’ who’ve never been here. Too bad for them…
Thank you for writing THIS!! 💕
Thank you for reading! <3
I love this and frankly I *love* San Francisco (native NYCer here, yes I’m also writing that so others know I *know* NYC 😂) just need to plan a trip!!
hahaha thank you! You get it. :)
Oh wow, where do I start? This pulled on my heart strings, all the way from Geary and Fillmore out to Sutro Baths. I am also a lover of SF. Grandpa was born there in 1900. I lived in the City (grew up in Oakland) through my 20s and 30s, probably going to some of the same bars as you. I was as in love with the City as anyone. And I have such mixed feelings about how I left. Thanks so much for writing this.
Thank you for reading it. 💗
Beautiful Teetee! I have found myself so drawn to this place since coming out there/here for work. The Ubers take forever (but now Waymo 😍) and I am often cold (i.e. willfully pack for whatever the weather is on the east coast), but there is a definite magic to it and I “get it”. I often say to people now, had I discovered it sooner, I would have wanted to try Karl in my 20s.
💗💗💗
By the way my honeymoon was in San Francisco for two weeks back in 2001 - I was a BABY - had my first Indian food there and saw my first anime film and made so many cool memories and met the best people… Saw so many strange things too but found it all really fascinating- the city was so fascinating to me - beautiful decay - the juxtapositions- the contrasts, I was dazzled. When I went back in 2011 to meet all of you at Chronicle for my book tour, it had changed in 10 years but I still loved it. I’ll never forget bringing 65 checks to Wells Fargo in 2001 and begging the bank to cash them because it was the only money we had for our honeymoon. We landed with $200 in our wallet and 3k in wedding checks. They assured us it would take 7-10 days before they cleared. I cried. We had $10 left and 8 days ahead of us. Stupid kids I know. BUT. The guy at the bank worked some kind of magic because the next day he called my hotel and told me to come over - all the checks had cleared. I cried some more. He did that for us. I honestly could never talk shit about San Francisco after that.
Awww I love this story Holly!
i love love love this. i’ve lived in SF for nearly a decade and refuse to leave. i heard someone on a podcast recently say she thought mill valley had ‘more going on’ while she then proceeded to call SF weird for 15 minutes. i saw red and her podcast is now dead to me. she clearly didn’t know how to experience all that SF offers, and that’s fine bc she prob doesn’t deserve it anyway.
thank you for loving on a city that i am so tired of hearing nothing but negative things about. i too have started to believe that someone hating SF is more of a reflection of them as a person than us as a city.